This is the first Sunday I’ve had off since August. It’s amazing, and I don’t quite know what to do with myself.
I know what I should do. Read the first three chapters of my book to prepare for book reading party. Try to find a chin rest to put on my violin that won’t destroy my neck, which is in a lot of pain right now. Think of something to make for lunch, go to the store, and make that. Probably take a shower.
Am I doing those things? Absolutely not. I’m writing this post and listening to music and thinking about how incredibly awesome it is that I have a Sunday off and that I don’t have to do anything I don’t want to today. Eventually I’ll read those chapters, because I’m excited about this damn party. Eventually I’ll go to the store because I love food. Showering may not happen. And I don’t have to play my violin until tomorrow night, so fixing that can wait. List halved. If I decide on a meal that my husband makes better, I won’t even have to cook!
Since August I’ve been teaching violin lessons on Sundays. Why? Because my brain was broken. I have orchestra stuff on Saturdays, and was always like “I can’t teach Saturday because it would be such a long day!” But now I think…. “If I teach Saturday, I don’t have to teach Sunday or Monday, and I don’t usually have orchestras those days either, so I can have two days off instead of just one.” Why didn’t I think of that sooner? Because my brain was broken.
I have that problem often. My brain being broken. I need to find a way to fix that. I can write, walk, practice, cook, and clean up a storm, but my brain still just turns on me every now and then and gets me stuck in stupid situations, like working six days a week when I only have to work five. Long story short… since August I’ve been working an extra day every week just because I was stupid. My brain lets me do stuff like that so often that I’m starting to think it’s kind of an ass*#&$. Thanks, brain.
It does good things for me, too, though. Like helping me realize I could change my schedule and have two days off. That was very nice of my brain. Or finally telling me that if my neck hurts and playing violin makes it worse, I actually don’t have to play while I teach. Because seventeen students each week equals about thirteen hours of playing that I don’t really need to do….
It makes me a little sad to admit that it took three years of teaching in pain to figure that one out. I’ll comfort myself by just blaming my jerkface brain.
So anyway… Sunday morning. Relaxing. Peaceful. Awesome. I don’t really have anything else to add because my brain is crapping out on me… Thoughts aren’t coming anymore.