I may have already said this, but I have a new writing goal. It is to finish a first draft of my book by the end of 2015. First, I have to finish my rewrite.
I’ve done some math and have figured out that I need to get through 50 pages a month to finish my rewrite by the end of July. I think that if I push the rewrite any later than that, it’ll be hard to finish the book by the end of the year. Five months isn’t much time as it is. Ideally, I’d like to finish the rewrite sooner.
The problem with that is that I feel like I’ve been making decent progress this month, but I added up the pages and so far I’m at 24. Not even halfway done, even though we’re halfway through the month. I’m at a point where I’m deleting large sections and fully rewriting them, which takes a lot more time than just the aggressive editing I was doing for a while. It’s necessary to change more now because what I have is starting to clash with what I’ve added during the rewrite. I’m reorganizing as I go, sometimes having to move entire scenes to a different place in the book. It’s probably going to be like this to the end of the rewrite, since I lost some focus during my writing and went into ramble mode. In other words, there’s a lot to fix.
I’m also adding pages for the first time in months. I’ve gone from 671 total pages to 675 over the last month. I’m sure it’ll get cut down again eventually, but right now it’s making me nervous.
I’m on page 444 of the rewrite. Only 231 pages to go. A year ago, that number would have seemed easy. 231 pages in 5 months? Not even all new content? No problem.
It’s just so much harder to get writing done now. It’s not the baby. I can easily write in the morning while he sleeps. The problem is everything else. Trying to fit cleaning, work, errands, paying bills, meeting customers out of town, etc into the day while also taking care of the baby. He and I have a good groove worked out. I know when he’ll want to eat, when he’ll want to sleep, and when he’ll just want to hang out and stare up at the lights on the ceiling, because that’s his new favorite thing. It’s everything else.
I wish there was a way to turn off reality for a few days. Maybe a week or two. I’m looking back at my first few weeks postpartum thinking they were just fabulous, wishing I’d gotten more writing done then, but I was so stressed and tired. It’s a shame I can’t combine the time I had then with how I feel now. I’d be a writing machine. Nothing would stop me!
I have to keep reminding myself that I’m an adult, and that jobs and errands are normal and that I don’t work very many hours. Doesn’t help. I just want to write and hang out with the baby anyway. Just because I’m an adult doesn’t mean I have to like it.
I’m going to add a sub-goal to my main goal. That sub-goal is to write every morning while the baby is sleeping, unless I have work. I will also try to write some of the evenings that my husband doesn’t have class and I don’t work, since he can watch the baby then (because the baby does NOT sleep in the evenings. At. All.) It doesn’t sound like much, adding half an hour here and there, but maybe it’ll make a big enough difference to keep me on track.
Working on the book instead of writing pointless posts on here would probably help, too. I’ll go do that now.