I think I wrote before that I had both writing and weight-loss goals for May, so here’s an update on that.
I haven’t lost a pound this month. I’m still sitting where I have been since February, but I have new motivation. I finally bought a new pair of pants so that I don’t have to continue wearing my maternity yoga pants (which make me look like a schlub.)
The pants are stretchy black jeans in a size 8. This was the first time I’ve tried on pants since giving birth, and it could be worse. My fears that I would be a size 10 or 12 were put to rest, because I’m pretty solidly an 8. It’s a tight fit, but the 10s were swimming on me.
Pre-pregnancy I was a size 4-6, depending on the pants, so going up one size (ish) is not the end of the world. I think I’m now average-sized. I must be, because finding size 8 pants was almost impossible. I kept seeing the size 6s and thinking “Too bad I’m not still in that size, because there’s 50 of them!”
I think I look horrible in the pants, but I know I look fine. I’m just still not used to my bigger self. All I see when I try on pants are saddle bags, and all I see when I try on shirts is my baby gut bulging out from the top of my pants, wiggling around like it’s made out of jello. These jeans minimize the saddle bags about as much as they can be minimized without me actually doing the hard work to make them shrink for real. So then there’s the gut. They’re tight at the top, so they kind of squeeze everything from the bottom up into my jelly belly. Attractive.
Hence, the new motivation. I want to look better than I have for the last 4 months, and I feel like these jeans can help me. If I lose even 2 or 3 pounds, that wibbly belly is going to look a lot less wibbly. If I lose 5, I might be able to hide that thing altogether with some well-fitting shirts. First I need to get some shirts, because all of mine were skin-tight before the weight gain. They’re like a second skin now. I’ve never liked skin-tight shirts and don’t even know why I wore them before, so I’m definitely not going to wear them now.
I’ve been doing better at controlling my eating, so now it’s time for exercise. Before the last month or so, I was doing a good job getting out for walks or runs 4 or 5 times a week, but it has rained in Denver every single day for about the last month, so that went out the window. I don’t mind walking in rain, but I was worried it would be too cold for the baby, even in the stroller.
I thought several times about going to a mall to walk. Denver has this great outlet mall called Colorado Mills that has a big loop with arms connecting everything to a middle food court. The loop is 3/4 of a mile, so 3 times around that would have been a decent walk. It’s also near Golden, my favorite part of the Denver metro area, out by the foothills that lead into the Rockies. I could have packed up the stroller and gone out there and stayed nice and dry and gotten some good exercise. Maybe seeing all the clothing stores would have inspired me to get some new clothes sooner.
But I didn’t do that. I don’t know why. Time got away from me. I still want to do it, even though the weather is better, because it’s a fun mall. Even if I don’t go to the mall, though, the rain has finally relaxed a bit. It’s nice and warm. No more excuses! Until, you know, it gets too warm.
With the notable exception of Memorial Day weekend, I’ve also been doing better at cutting sweets. Memorial Day weekend was a total pig fest, involving a lot of Kit Kats and those damn tempting Reese’s on Sunday, then a boatload of delicious ice cream on Monday. It was not a proud moment for me.
My new plan for sweets is to have one every weekend, but to have ONE every weekend. A piece of cake. A single, snack-sized bag of Reese’s minis. An ice cream. You get the idea. I feel like I’ve written this exact thing before, but I mean it this time, dang it. I can and will get my sweet tooth under control before I rot my teeth out of my head and give myself Type 2 diabetes. If that’s how it works…. I’m not a doctor.
The good news is that even though I was a total lazy blob weight-wise this month, I did much better with writing. I surpassed my 50-page goal for May. 58 pages, which is 16 pages more than last month. This means that I have to get through 56 pages in both June and July to finish my rewrite by the end of July. Considering that I got 58 this month and half of that was completely new material, I know I can do it.
I’ve never been this close to finishing a full book before. It’s so exciting. The thought of achieving this goal is keeping me going. I’m working on the story as soon as I’m done with this post. I have a lot going on in June, including a trip to Las Vegas, some playing work (for the first time since November), and moving into a new place at the end of the month, but I’m going to keep that in mind as I go along and write as much as possible during the slower times. Now that I’m this close, I’m not going to let being a little busy stop me.
I’m on page 558/669. This monster is getting up there. I have no idea how long it’s going to be once I’m finished with the final part. I’m so excited to write it, though. I’ve been planning this ending out in my head for four years now, and I am finally about to get to write it. It’s not sky-diving, bungee-jumping, skiing, or whatever else people do to get their thrills, but it’s the most exhilarating feeling to me.